How the world would have been if....

It was time to tuck my 5 year old son under the blanket after a goodnight kiss. His eyes were wide open and he was perceivably absent minded in his 'hmm' responses to my pep talk. Sensing his mind was racing with thoughts, I paused and put my hand on his head and messed up his hair a bit to get his attention. He was quite. I slowly asked him - 'what are you thinking Vishu?'. His attention was still wandering in the silent woods. I was getting curious now, a bit bordering on a real concern. I again asked him, what was he thinking. His response came very quietly - 'Nothing Daddy'. But I knew there is something bothering him very deeply for he is not a kid of question-shy nature. I persisted with my patented 'father-son' talk and he finally came out with his question in a very quite, matter-of-fact way - 'Daddy, I am thinking how this world would have been if I was not born in it. Do you know?'. For once, I had no response for his question. I was overwhelmed with mixed feelings - should I feel happy for him that his thoughts are so deep for his age and he is understanding the true meaning of life - for all its glory how transient it is. Or should I feel sad that he may lose his innocence about life sooner than needed, resulting in ??

Its been almost 3 years since that goodnight kiss, he still amuses me with his out-of-the-world questions. He is every bit a headache like any 8 year old boy but also a darling of his parents.